Day Seven

From her sister, following an email of Scoops rankings:

(Smidge), u realize that I AM at the top of that list, right?

Technically, I've already beaten u

MEOW

Smidge:

No I'm everyone on that list because it's my electronic device

Sent from my iPod

Sis:

U SUCK!!!!!!!!!

Smidge:

You SUCKIDY SUCK SUCK so there!!!

Sis:

U STILL SUCK

Smidge:

You still SUCKIDY SUCK SUCK and now are sOOOOOOO SUCKY I can't even believe how much YOU SUCK

Day Six

Her Aunt G is Concerned:

You have been very quiet. What's going on?

Smidge: 

I haven't had time for email and I can't even stay on the iPod for half an hour without (father's full name) going "Smidge hurry up I want a turn to check something!"

Aunt G is supportive:

Tell your Dad to get his own electronics

Smidge:

I did he said "no go play somewhere else". I'm sooo Bord I have nothing to do and I'm about to leave for a really SUCKY place (school) docent that totally suck??

Her father fights back:

Smidge,

You are an e-mail maniac.  I don't check my email very often, so try talking to me in person.

Dad

Smidge:

But I like the iPod and you know you do too so no complaining!

In response to her mother, discussing holiday gifts:

Mom, that is a really bad idea. You know nothing about my teacher so we should according to ( me) the person who knows the most about her

In response to her mother, injured:

You should really pay more attention to things. I mean really you forgot you had a broken foot! I mean who does that!?

Her mother's response:

I don't know! Maybe someone with a kid who keeps forgetting her broken shoulder?

Smidge:

I'm going to at least punch you for that and I'm NOT kidding

Day Four and Five

Hey (Aunt G) I'm really exited because I'm going to go see my friends show of the nutcracker! OMG!!!  I am dressing up and I think it's going to be awesome 2

Aunt G replies:

The show is a little bit crazy but the music is good.  I'm sure (your friend) will be happy to have you there. Maybe you can get her autograph for me

Smidge:

I dought it! Oh and thanks for telling me that

The next day:

Hey (Aunt G) I want to tell you that I think you might be a little to awesome to hold it all in so be awesome all you want to! Oh and my dad still likes you a little bit I think.

Aunt G agrees:

I am totally awesome and thank you for noticing. That would be crazy if (your dad) didn't like me because I'm so awesome

Smidge:

I know right I think so to

Day Three

In which her 12 year old sister is motivated to send her first email (in excess of one word) ever:


Dear (sister),

This message is to tell you that I have acquired your EMAIL address and would like to tell you that not only that if you highlight the end of this message you will receive my feelings about all your unnecessary brouhaha.  But, all feelings of loathing aside, here are some emoticons that I think you might find useful.

Sincerely,

(Carefully Composed Signature) (your sister)

P.S. I believe that you do not want me to @#$%^&@#$%^@#$%^ pummel you, you @#$%^&*(@#$%^&*@#$%^& @#$^&*@#$%^&*@#$%^&#$%^, so don't be mean please.

The initial response:

Well same thing back times 2!!!!!!!!!!!!! What the heck!




To her mother, upon a complaint of excessive noise levels:


I know you can send her to her room unless she can be quiet enof for you to think and then we will be happy

The response:

I don't think she would be happy, so 'we' would not be happy. YOU might be happy...... Also, you could stop being so hilarious and then she wouldn't laugh so much. 

Seconds later:

Im halerios because I am and that's that, Meany mom I was just sugesting and man you can't stop so your like me alot 

Her mother responds:

Actually, that's true. you are hilarious.

Seconds later:

Thankyou and I know I am I'm just saying

Day Two

After Aunt S welcomes her to email:

Thanks  for saying that , but I have even better news!.... I am almost done with broken bones!! I think it will feel weird not broken because I'm so used to it.

Delayed response to same welcome from Aunt G:

You hear corectly and I LOVE email!

To Aunt W:

Not to be mean, but you didn't have to say hugs and kisses I mean that's just rediculios you know?




Sent link by Aunt G:

I don't really get it because it's so hard to draw the stick man with a small screen like on my iPod.

Aunt G suggests using the desktop:

Alright I will because I'm good at stick people.

Seconds later:

Mom I got kicked off the computer by a Weirdo named dad or (father's nickname) or (father's full name) and he won't let me back on!! Isent that a outrage?

Seconds later:

Hey (Aunt G)  I just got kicked off the computer by (father's full name) and he won't let me do that! What a ripoff!!!!

Aunt G intervenes:

Tell your dad kids have rights too and he should go fold the laundry or something to help your mom and get off the computer

Smidge replies:

I tried that and he said go away I'm busy here.

Access gained:

I think it worked really well and I also think I draw wonderful stick people

Aunt G replies:

I'm not surprised. I've seen your art and it is as awesome as you are

Seconds later:

That's a lie I am so awesomer than my art but my art is awesome so thanks

Day One

In response to multiple emails from family:

Thanks for welcoming me to email, and so far I think email is cool to!

To her Father:

Yo dad I love email and I am sending it from my iPod!! Oh and please say hi to (her cousin) for me and tell her I want to see her at my birthday party whether you want to come (which you probably want to) or not 'cause she needs to see me with no broken arms!!

One minute later:

Yo dad I like all of the things I get from you when you go to germany and I would love it if you would get me more stuff on your next trip and I want you to stay home longer this time ok?

One minute later:

Hey dad I think you should seriously cut down on my chores and I don't care about how hard you make (her sister) work (p.s. Write me back because I like to read peoples messages and you can trust your
Kid can't you?) anyway I know you can so please make me do less chores

One minute later:

Dad I'm so Bord and I only
Have three people I can email so I'm getting kind of Bord you know? Anyway i want you to know I am not playing animal Jam because (her sister) is hoging the computer by checking all of her unread email which is like 500000 of them because she NEVER checks her email because she apparently has better things to do than check what achual people have to say to her!

In response to her aunt:

Hey (Aunt G) I liked the message you sent me ,and I think you should send me more, because I like to read all kinds of emails and I only have 3 emails, so I'm getting kind of bord here you know?

Aunt G's Response:

I totally know. Wait until u have a job. Then you really need emails to keep you from being bored.
What's for dinner at your house?

Smidge Replies:

Steak and I know how you feel because I have a job on a game and it totally sucks!I mean you have to stand there all day! Its a outrage I tell you!!

To her father:

I like pie. You like pie. We all like pie. I just thought of that one. Do you like it? Oh by the way I have to say this to you and mom ...... THANK YOU (for Animal Jam!!)

Her Aunt M sends her video links:

Thanks I loved them and you can write me if you want to if you don't it dosent matter, because I also get other ones but the more the better you know?